Diary Of A Dope-Ass Spartan

If you ain't about that life then don't sign up for it! You want to be in a relationship and act like you're single? It doesn't work like that! Stop playing with people's feelings. I think people don't realize that breaking someone's heart is way deeper than any of us can ever imagine. You break that person's heart, they end up beating themselves up for what? Being loyal to you when you're the one that couldn't deliver? You mess with their feelings making that heart feel like those feelings are real. You promise someone the world then leave them with nothing? You can't say you're "different" when you're not. What if the heart actually believes you? Don't promise anyone anything if you can't deliver because broken promises lead to disappointments. You destroy their out look on love, ever wonder where trust issues come from? Being played and being made a fool off. Like I said if you ain't about that life then plea...

" What you think about me is irrelevant. Look deeper, harder, go on...What do you see? Your reflection of yourself when you look in the mirror?"- Samuel Soto. So I am one of those people that are fiercely loyal, you come after a friend or someone I really care about I cannot let it go. I have no respect for people that gossip, spread lies or talk smack about someone they don't even know. It's not about haters hating or "bitches" being well bitches (excuse my French), I honestly think it has something to do with ones self-esteem. You spend half your time gossiping, talking down on someone what's it going to do for you? How about you spend that time trying to solve world hunger or doing something productive with your life? I mean I know everyone is human but that's no excuse. Make sure you're perfect/sin free before you start trying to find all the flaws in someone else and show them off to the world. "Mind over matter, I don't mind an...

No truer words have ever been said. I mean there's just something about a bad boy that gets us going. Women are so messed up in the head, well I guess not all women because there's some that go for the good guys, the soft ones, the loyal ones, the ones you know will always be there. Sounds like a dog if you ask me, no offence though. Back to my point sometimes we really know how wrong they are for us, bad is written all over them but it's just too late to leave because we'll already be in too deep. I think we should sue our parents and those kindergarten teachers that used to tell us that when a boy is teasing you or treating you bad it means they like you because fifteen or twenty years later we still have that mentality and it's so wrong but yet it feels so good. A relationship with a bad boy is addictive, it's got an edge to it you know? Those roller coaster rides are too good, when it's high we'll try to hold on to that high for as long as we can bu...

Let's take a moment to talk about domestic violence and how black women are the top of the list. Domestic violence is more than a black eye, I want to know how and when it will end. Sometime women take it lightly or just brush it off because he loves you and says "sorry baby, I'll never touch you like that again" but that apology comes with a fist. It's not love period. I don't care how old you are, how long you have been dating/married or if you're too scared to lose him. If he already put his hands on you then you've lost him already. Don't stick around just to be put six feet under. Now I know it might seem as though I'm mainly talking to black women but it's only because we are the number one targets of domestic violence. I know this happens to all of us black or white. This is an issue that goes on each and every single day of our lives! I read somewhere that "the 'strong black woman' stereotype makes it impossible fo...

Sometimes life happens, things go wrong and you just feel like you're suffocating, you don't know where to go or who to turn to. You think if you go to your friends they'll judge you and you don't want to get on your knees and talk to the big guy up there because you don't know if he'll keep forgiving you, stupid as it may sound. Everything happens for a reason I always say but what if we have the power to stop some of the things that happen, what if we have the power to stop ourselves from having that kind of regret. Everything does happen for a reason and God does not give us obstacles we cannot handle. Regret is a wasted emotion, you can't take back your mistake so might as well make the best of it. I think we should all look on the bright side, there is always a light at the end of every dark tunnel. Praying helps and if it's not okay then it's not the end! God will never abandon you in your hour of need, when that little voice in your hea...

I know I've talked about this before but I don't care I will keep talking till it stops. This is just a rant so stay with me aha. So someone called me ugly and fat today and I'm not going to lie if it was back in the day I would probably have been offended. Now it just makes me angry. It's people like you that make me ashamed of being a woman sometimes. I mean I'm nineteen and you're twenty-three what business do you have comparing us two? You might be older but I am probably a better person than you will ever be. Please help me understand here, what is your definition of pretty? Did calling me ugly make you any prettier? Did calling me fat make you any skinnier? After saying that to me how did it make you feel? Are you happy with yourself now? I feel nothing but sadness for people like you. I mean just because someone does not fit a certain image of what they should be in your mind does not mean they should be that image. We all have different definitions...

Sometimes i miss my girls but God they can be annoying at times. We skype every week and half the time the conversations are about their boyfriends. Now i'm not that bitter single friend that I'm sure we all have but it just gets annoying. I mention how bored i get when they start yapping about their guys, they get on my case about finding the right one. I have one hang out spot in this city, I'm there every weekend so I'm sure I won't be finding my Mr right soon, not that I want to. Anyway the reason for this post. I was talking to my friends a while ago and again the topic about boys came up, as usual I had to tell them to just shut the fudge up!!(there really isn't any nicer way to put it). If it's not setting me up on dates it's annoying me about being more social and finding that one guy. I say why settle for one when I can have ten you know? Nah I'm kidding. I guess I just want them to understand that I am perfectly fine being alone, I lik...

This is going to be one of those rare occasions when I actually get to open up about myself. For the past couple of weeks I have been feeling a bit off, like I was not myself. Now I swear I am not an emotional person, I've only ever had two or three of these unusual moments. I suppress my feelings so much that sometimes I think I'm some robot. I will admit I was never like this but two years ago on this day I shut down, it happened over night. Heartbreak, love, forever, relationships no matter how much it hurt or what I saw my friends going through I was always optimistic. "If it wasn't better it wasn't the end" was my motto. The only reason I kept being so open minded was because of my aunt, more like my second mother really. This woman was one of the strongest women I will ever know as long as I shall live. She loved with all her heart and she lived everyday like it was her last day to live. Two years ago she passed away and I think a part of me died with h...

I have a friend that freaks out at everything. You have to be careful what you do or what you say around her. It's like you're always walking on ice. See the thing with this friend is I let her walk all over me and I really don't know why. I was her go to girl, the one that was always there no matter what, the one that never said no. We used to have our fights but I'm sure we all go through that with our friends. I wouldn't say anything and she would paint me so bad to her friends but then when things go bad with them she'd then come back to me. The funny thing with people like her is that instead of apologizing they paint themselves as the victims. I cared so much about her needs that I ended up neglecting my own needs. My actions taught her how to treat me until I adjusted my behavior. It's great to be the nice guy but when it comes at the expense of your own dignity then you need an injection of backbone. We all have that one person that thinks ...

Random rant, well not really random because this is actually an issue that is making me angry. This thing called media is pretty messed up and the way us as black people seem to be fighting to make our race look bad is maddening. I was just cleaning my room and of course I just had to start thinking. The way black sisters are taking off their clothes now just to sell records. I've never seen Adele taking off her clothes but she's won awards for her work. These musicians have become so desperate that they are losing focus of who they are. Kids look up to people like Beyonce, Rihanna, Ciara e.t.c now don't get me wrong their music is good but the image they portray is just not appropriate especially when they know their music captures the younger audience. I'm not going to make this about race but this just happens, the population of white girls idolize singers like Adele and Taylor Swift and they're clothes are always on. If I was a mother those are the kind of peopl...

I'm pretty sure every girl wants THE WOW factor but what is THE WOW factor? I was catching up with my friend today and boy have I missed her, she's a little ball of fire and I absolutely love her to bits. We were talking about guys, I mean we're girls what else are we supposed to talk about when we're catching up? Back to guys and the WOW factor, I don't really know how to explain it. It's not something you can explain, it's something you feel. We're not hopeless romantics at all, if you see us you'd agree, we just want the WOW factor. I'll try to explain It as best as I can. The WOW factor is that undeniable chemistry that has you wanting to run for the hills but has you paralysed and wanting more at the same time. Believe me we're not into the whole fairy tale type of love or relationships. There is a happily ever after for everyone but we try to keep it realistic. This isn't only about me and her though, it's about all girls, I...

This afternoon two explosions occurred near the finish line at the Boston Marathon. At least two people were killed and a lot more wounded. This is a sad day. Words cannot express how saddened we all are to hear of this terrible incident. That said i'm also sorry to day this but America's open society makes them vulnerable to  that type of terrorism. America as a whole should not let terrorists change them into fearful people. This is the time to stand united together. Whoever did this is a coward. There were many people participating not only from America but from all around the world. Not only did they attack Boston, this was not an attack on America only either but an attack on the world. America needs to step up their homeland security and everyone around the world should send their prayers to Boston. May God Bless you all.

Since some next genius invented booty shaking seems like every youngin' out there wants to be seen dropping it like it's hot! What I'm talking about isn't just referring to young black girls, it goes for every girl out there but since I'm a young impressionable black woman too might as well speak to my people since we're the ones that think we can twerk, booty shake, drop it low better than any other girls out there. Where I'm from taking the kind of videos that will embarrass your parents in public is frowned upon. As an African girl I don't think that just because you're in a different country you have to throw away your traditions and go crazy. You see 16 year olds having sex, it's a sad world I tell you. I'm worried about our generation. We should be making our parents proud instead of embarrassing our ancestors. I'm not judging anyone here because believe me I can get down in the club but I have my limits and I know them. See girls ...

I know I've been awol for a couple of weeks but I just couldn't find the energy or inspiration to write something or anything. I'm back though and today I'm gonna tell you a little story about my two friends Violet and Indigo, yes those are not their real names lol. Moving on my two special friends were dating brothers and girls know how cool that is. Best friends dating brothers, it's adorably 1950's right? We'll start with Violet, she was happy yada-yada-yada, they were friends before anything else and she knew what she was getting herself into, when your mind is made up that's it. It's done! Now Violets guy (we'll call him Danny) has a leech of an ex and a psycho baby mums but we can't fault him cause of that right? No it' not his fault so Violet decided to stay. For months everything was perfect, they'd have their fights but what couple doesn't? Here's where everything gets fucked up (excuse my French . Our Danny boy is...

The most common thing that's going on these days with out generation is the issue about commitment or lack off. With guys they can't make a commitment, they just want to reap the reward, they want to milk the cow before making a down payment and just the mention of a family one day makes them turn their backs and RUN. Girls crave commitment, contentment, they want to settle down so we don't understand why it would be hard for a guy to just make it official. I mean if ya'll have an agreement Then hey whatever floats your boat, whatever pings your pong, whatever blows your skirt up, literally lol. Now I'm going to move on to how girls commit before he even asks. I set up my friends a couple of weeks ago and they seem to be in love right now or in like with a capital L. Honestly I think they both have commitment phobia but who doesn't sometimes right? Their situation is perfect though because they live three hours away from each other. There's a quote that goes...

I wasn't going to post anything till tomorrow but boy am I mad!!!! Why do we support this? Why do we keep listening to their music when they are going right ahead and dissing us, disrespecting us, labelling us? This is really grinding my gears!! I'm pretty sure as black women we're all mad and next time I see someone hash tagging #teamlightskin #teamdarkskin I'm gonna slap some good sense into them. Growing up there was none of this. There are so many things wrong with us as people these days. We are so into material things, so vain that we don't even realize how this is affecting our culture as black people. We as brothers and sister need to support each other. Why label us darkskin or lightskin? What suddenly there's something wrong with a "sista" now? I either have to be light or dark? Why can't I just be me? Why can't you respect me when I'm just me? My sister sent me that and she's mad too. She told me about this line that this guy...

I'm not a person who gets inspired easily, it takes something really big to get me going. I woke up to an Angela Davis quote today and three hours later I'm still in bed, still trying getting more acquainted with the icons that made it possible for me and all black women out there to have rights. For the first time in a long time I feel really passionate about something and I'm gonna hold on to this feeling for a long time. After getting to know more about my history, it kinda puts everything into perspective. You have someone like Assata Shakur who fought for you and is now an escaped convict because she stood up for what she believed in, someone like Rosa Parks who now has been reduced to a simple "NO" because that is the only word people make a mockery out of instead of focusing on the kind of impact that simple "NO" did. You have  Angela Davis famously known for her afro and yet there is so much more to the woman than some fashion statement.  There...

I didn't know how to start this blog, I thought funny would do, then serious because I wanted to talked about one thing. I started this blog two months ago and I just deleted everything because after going through all the staff I had this morning I decided I was writing a load of boring bullocks. One; I don't know what love is, I think I've only loved the idea of being in-love with someone but now that's I'm older and wiser....not really lol I realize I've never been in love and hopefully never will although I'm still gonna talk about it. Two; I am misunderstood, I mean isn't it what all teenagers feel like? Three; I could talk about food all day lol, yes I'm a fatty. So I think I've been doing it all wrong for the last couple of months. I was limiting myself to one thing or the common things most popular to teenagers that I forgot I won't be one soon so I need to start thinking like an adult but still being funny me. So I talked to myself an...